This message sent by: Megan Madonna <mmadonna@erols.com>

I wrote this last week and have been debating whether or not to post
it.  But I decided that it was not worth the brain cells and have
decided to just take a deep breath and go ahead and do it.  I do not
usually write song-related stories, but in this case I could not help
myself.  It is set sometime after SoB in a semi-sorta AU (since we all
know TPTB would never have allowed this to take place.)

****Special thanks to Lora *wave* for thwapping me over the head with
some fairly obvious holes in the original plot <bg>.

Disclaimers

(1) The characters in the following story belong to James D. Parriot,
Tri-Star/Columbia Pictures TV, et al.. No copyright infringement is
implied or
intended.

(2) "The First Time I Loved Forever" is the theme song to the TV show
Beauty and the Beast.  It was written and sung by Melanie.  No copyright
infringement was implied or intended.

Permission to archive on JADFE.  I have also put it up on my own web
site at http://www.angelfire.com/va/MerlinsEye.
____________________________

The First Time I Loved Forever
(N/LC, non-explicit)
by Megan Madonna

Nick grabbed a crimson-filled bottle from the refrigerator and threw
himself down on his couch, shutting his eyes and praying for temporary
oblivion.  He was tired and frustrated.  Within one night, what had once
seemed to him to be the ultimate prize was suddenly much less appealing.

****Flashback: earlier that morning****

He and Tracy were reveling in their first fairly slow night in weeks
when the call came over the police radio.  Ten minutes later, they
arrived on one of the worst murder scenes Nick had ever witnessed.  Even
the vampire lurking within was quelled by the grizzly nature of the
killings.  The bodies of 67 children, ranging in age from 5 months to 17
years, and 22 adults were scattered throughout the orphanage,
slaughtered by gunfire and hideously disemboweled.  The perpetrators had
apparently turned their weapons on themselves after they had completed
their mission, adding eight more bodies to the count. As he surveyed the
scene, a child's refuge flooded with blood, Nick's already-wavering
faith in humanity plummeted.

****Present****

He leaned into the warm embrace of the soft leather and sighed.  It was
not the leather's embrace he yearned for.  A translucent image of his
sire floated just out of reach, unbidden, as desire stirred.  His eyes
slammed open.  'Where the hell did *that* come from?'

Closing his eyes once more, Nick allowed the earliest memories of his
unlife to surface.  He was too tired to fight the truth. He recalled the
first moment he'd laid eyes on LaCroix -- little did he know how quickly
those icy blue eyes would pierce his soul and claim his heart forever.

 The first time I loved forever
 Was when you whispered my name
 And I knew at once you loved me
 For the me of who I am

A lifetime later, or so it had seemed to Nick at the time, he'd found
himself standing in the sand facing the doorway to judgement.  The soft
light had beckoned to him but he could not step in.  In the distance, he
heard a voice whispering his name over and over, strains of silk calling
him back, reclaiming him.  He knew that the decision had been his, a
choice that was never really a choice.  He'd known in his heart that he
had to return to those startling eyes, to those tender lips.

 The first time I loved forever
 I cast all else aside
 And I bid my heart to follow
 Be there no more need to hide

Nick felt a familiar presence hovering just outside his skylight and
belatedly realized that he'd been broadcasting his inner turmoil down
the link he shared with his master.  LaCroix descended slowly, landing
just behind where his son sat on the couch.  Nick did not look up but
sent a mental greeting.  Unwilling to speak, he opened his mind to share
his memories of a time when they had been connected by more than just a
psychic link.  Cherished days spent wrapped in strong arms melded with
images of wild, passionate evenings spent exploring every inch of each
other.

 And if wishes and dream are merely for children
 And if love's a tale for fools
 I'll live this dream with you

LaCroix had come to the loft intending to turn Nicholas' present doubt
to his own advantage; subtly twisting the situation to further his own
goals and bring his son that much closer to a return to his true
nature.  The memories Nicholas chose to share with him, however, caused
him to re-evaluate his plans.  Without a word, LaCroix sat next to his
son.  Nick felt himself being gathered into his father's arms as soft,
warm lips brushed against his forehead.  He tilted his face up to his
sire's to catch the next kiss with his mouth, turning into the comfort
of the embrace.  His fear and apprehension at returning to his lover's
side began to diminish.  Getting back to the intimacy they had once
shared would take time, Nick knew, but he could finally admit his desire
to try.

For all my life and forever
There's a truth I will always know
When my world divides and shatters
Your love is where I'll go

 -Fini-