I guess I should say the Forever Knight characters, Nick Knight and Natalie Lambert, do not belong to me but the TPTB. I don't intend to harm them at all, just give them what I feel they never got during the show. It is also my gift to Natalie who has stood by our hero's side and got nada......well I think you know what I mean. Warning: This is a Nick and Nat story and has some sap in it. If you don't like that stuff, hit delete now. I also wanted to let you know that this is a first attempt at writing an adult situation. I hope my humble beginning is worth your perusal. One last moment of thanks and appreciation to my beta reader, Marci, for taking time away from her family to help me improve this story. I would also like to thank the crowd on IRC for all their encouragement to post this story. Thanks for the kind words guys or else this may hav wound up in the recycle bin. Now, one last comment and then on with the smut...er story. This story takes place immediately after the Sons of Belial. The song "Every Time I Fall Back" is by Pat Benatar. The song "If That's What It Takes" is by Celine Dion. Every Time I Fall Back by Texasbrat She had come to offer some solace, to hold him in her arms and offer sweet words of reassurance and encouragement. But how had she found him......drinking human blood.....guzzling it even. The shame he had felt, the helplessness in the aftermath of the demon's possession of his already tortured soul. He had felt violated, used, a puppet of a beast who would revel in conflict, manipulation, torture, and ........death. Yes, he had won the war for his soul, but in the wake of the final battle he had lost much. Dark desires again whispered in his ear tempting him back, seducing him back with the singing of the sanguine nectar of human blood. He had felt her fear of him, smelt it in her scent as she cautiously approached him to console him. "My brave little angel," thought Nick. Her faith had been shaken as for the first time she had become the prey of the beast, a last attempt by the demon to drive out the goodness he had cultivated. To have destroyed Natalie Lambert would have been a victory indeed. Without her, the demon would have usurped his soul from himself, from LaCroix. It had been *her* voice that penetrated his fugue state and renewed the vigor to drive out the malevolent adversary. "I can stay with you if you want......." she had said. "I'm fine," Nick had replied in strained tones. "....It's over Nick........ "Was it?" he thought later after she had gone. "It never ends.......the struggle *never* ceases! How can I make you understand that, Nat" How much more could he take? The countless setbacks and disappointments were taking their toll on his emotional resolve, depleting his precious reserve of hope. With trembling fingers Nick reached toward his stereo and flipped on the power and then trudged back to the refrigerator as once again the consuming hunger whispered its demands....... I don't know if it's me or just the sign of the times But I want a better life than the one I've been living Ain't no one says that you can't change who you are Ain't no law says you gotta take what you're given I wanna find a place where the nights are warm And the wind don't blow so cold against my skin I wanna find some shelter....... Someone's arms....... When I go too far I know that Everytime I fall back You grab my shoulder to keep me from falling Everytime I fall back You're arms are open I hear you calling me I believe that people are the same where ever you go Everybody's seen their reflection The face we wear is not a face at all No. We've lost all direction Don't want to dance the dance of the fool no more Don't want to give away my soul away for nothing Don't want to sell myself door to door Taking a final swallow of the sweet elixir, Nick turned back towards the massive wooden fireplace and was suddenly startled by his own reflection in the mirror. His eyes were golden.........feral......His fangs were slightly protruding from under his lips........the sound of prey in the streets below burning in his ears........ "No......oh God........no! Not again, not *ever* again!!!!!! Oh God......help me......give me strength," cried Nick in anguish as he hurled the drained bottle toward the reflection of horrors and shattered it. Just like his life, the mirror lay in pieces on the floor. No direction, no cohesion left ....his sanity balancing on the jagged precipice of despair. Out of the corner of his eye, a small bundle of blue caught Nick's attention. Natalie's sweater.......Nick flew across the room and buried his face in the soft folds of the fabric breathing in the sweet scent that belonged only to her. God, how he needed her soft comfort now.........how he hungered for her gentle caress........ I just want to know that Every time I fall back, You grab my shoulder to keep me from falling Every time I fall back, Your arms are open, I hear you calling me........ I hear you calling me......... I hear you calling me The consuming agony and despair became unbearable.........he was falling so fast.Defenseless against the onslaught of warring emotions, Nick cried out his torment.Feeling the walls begin to close, Nick hurled himself skyward, shattering the skylight above. The dark figure slowly approached the sleeping woman. Her auburn curls were spread across the pillow, one arm slightly curving around her grey and white cat that lay snuggled under her chin. Sensing another presence in the room the animal stirred from its slumber. Upon seeing the predator's feral gaze, the feline nimbly sprang to its feet, arched its back, and emitted a low growl of warning. As the intruder stalked towards the bed, the cat hissed in defiance. The challenge was met and answered in kind but with considerable more force than the small adversary. Defeated, the cat relinquished his prize. Natalie Lambert rolled to her back and sat up agaisnt the pillows, eyes wide with apprehension. She lifted her chin slightly and faced the intruder. "Nick?" she said in a hesitant voice, "Is that you?" Without answering Nicholas Knight moved silently out of the shadows toward Natalie, his eyes golden. "Nick, what's wrong.........why are you here........." came the nervous query. Nick continued his advance, his stalking gaze paralyzing its prey. "Nick!.......Please! Tell me what's wrong!" Natalie cried anxiously in her desperation to discern this provocative behavior so unlike the Nick she knew. The vampire's only answer was to draw back the sheet, force her backward onto the bed, and press his body down onto hers. Nick reached for, and captured, both of Natalie's wrists, pinning them above her head. He began to rain soft kisses along her hairline flowing down the gentle slope of her neck. Upon reaching the base, he lifted his head and slowly rubbed his cheek against her own, emitting a sigh of contentment at the intimate contact. "Nick......," gasped Natalie in tortured breath as she tried to gather her shattered wits. She was swept by an onslaught of tumultuous emotions evoked by Nick: fear......arousal........concern for Nick's uncharacteristic behavior........ "Please, Nat don't talk.....I need you now.....to be close to you......touch you......" answered Nick, his voice rough. He would brook no argument, no refusal. Not when he needed her so terribly. Nick shifted both of Natalie's wrists to one hand and brought its companion down to caress her cheek. It then drifted down her neck, her shoulder, and came to rest upon the mound beneath her negligee. His long fingers stroked the fullness of her breast, working their way upward to lightly pinch and roll the pink nipple at the peak with thumb and forefinger. Abruptly the tantalizing hand ceased its torment. Nick unfastened each pearl button then gently removed one side of the gown, then the other. The sensation of the silken fabric sliding across her breasts caused Natalie to moan in pleasure. Her nipples contracting to small nubs as arousal blossomed. Nick leaned forward to taste one nub, swirling his tongue around its outline and then suckling, drawing it deep within his mouth. Natalie trembled with the force of her rising passion. "Please, Nick.....release my hands" she pleaded. "*No*" came the emphatic response. Instead Nick used his free hand to unbutton his own shirt which he then quickly discarded. Waves of sensual pleasure washed over both lovers as skin met skin. Plunging forward Nick penetrated Natalie's mouth in a hard, searing kiss that stole her breath away. He continued to plunder her mouth until her body writhed beneath his in primal need. Natalie felt a warmth beginning to build deep inside and radiate outward from her womb. Suddenly releasing her lips, Nick lifted his head and stared down at Natalie with tortured eyes. "I want to take you, Nat. possess all that you are.........please Nat..... give into me......... drive it away......help me!" he pleaded. Nick resumed his sensual barrage of Natalie's senses, building them to a fevered hunger that matched his own. His lips plundered relentlessly, tasting every exquisite inch of her exposed flesh. But it wasn't enough. He wanted more. She wanted more. He could see it in her eyes as he looked into them. "I'll make you feel good, Nat. I promise. Just let me have you tonight........please! I need too have you, be in you, be part of you and make you a part of me." Nick could feel the dark desires of depravity and destruction well up within him. The bitter legacy of the demon's possession had reawakened the vampire's desire to possess a soul utterly. To control that soul, devour its fear, gorge on its essence, and steal away its vitality in order to slake the never ending thirst. Nick's body shuddered in revulsion, feeling the bile rise at the back of his throat. But he wouldn't let demon win. Not when he had his salvation here in his arms. She would drive it all away. He would take her this night and she would conquer the evil coursing through him. She gave him strength when his own faltered. She gave him resolve when his crumbled. She gave him reason and logic when he became lost in sorrow and guilt. She was everything. Nick reached down and began fumbling with the zipper on his jeans. Using his free hand, he was soon released from his confinement. He wanted to fill her up and feel himself slide within the slick tightness of her vagina. He wanted to feel her contracting around his swollen member as she climaxed. Wanted to hear his name on her lips as she screamed out her fulfillment. But first he had to prepare her. Give her the pleasure that would fuel his own when he took her. He reached for Natalie's undies. Natalie felt the garment being ripped away, exposing her most hidden secrets to the usurping hand now caressing the soft folds of her labia. Nat's breath caught in her throat as she felt Nick's hand move to her clitoris. His thumb flicked gently across the sensitive mound. Then she felt exquisite pressure and penetration as Nick slipped two fingers inside her vagina, moving them at a tortuously sweet slow pace, in and out. Natalie gasped as her body moved of its own accord in response to the sensual rhythm that Nick had set in motion. She felt every thrust of his hand and moved to push him ever deeper inside her. She could feel the heat building in her mid-section, her womb coiling ever tighter in anticipation of the pulsating release to come. "Nick!" cried Natalie. "Please I.......I......need you to....to" Nick smothered her plea in a sensuous kiss, his tongue prying her lips open to delve into her mouth. Nat made soft mewling noises, begging her tormenting lover to fulfill his promise of possession. But still it was not yet to be. Without breaking the kiss, Nick removed his free hand from her inner core. He gently raised Nat up and pulled pillows beneath her shoulder blades. Then, with great care, he pushed her backward across the pillows, with her head slightly lower than the level of her shoulders allowing her breasts to rise upwards and pull taught. Nick entwined both his hands with hers and held them to the side of her head. Natalie was now fully exposed and vulnerable to Nick's lips as he once again captured their peaks in this mouth. By now, every one of Nat's nerve endings were burning. Nick let his mouth travel downwards to her navel. His kisses blazed a trail back up and around her right breast coming to rest on the contracted pink center. He suckled first one peak then the other until his own need to be inside her compelled him to move his engorged penis to the entrance of her sweetness. Nick could feel the warm slickness of her as his lower body rubbed against her. "Oh God!" cried Nat as she felt him enter her and begin to move. Tears of frustration slid down Natalie's cheeks. She wanted to grab him, touch him, and force him to increase his slow rhythm to a fervent pounding. Her lower body bucked and writhed to encourage a more passionate mating. "Nick......release me...let me touch you......" whimpered Nat. "NO! You'll leave me........"gasped Nick as he struggled to control his desire. "I won't leave you Nick..........please.....!" begged Nat. "I frightened you tonight when I let the vampire out Nat! I saw the look in your eyes! And it's going to emerge again and very soon, but I need you too much tonight Natalie. You don't know how much," said Nick in a hoarse tortured voice. "I can't let you leave me now. Not even if I wanted too. I don't think I'll make it if you aren't here." "Nick, I promise you, I won't leave. You're in so much pain. I just want to hold you in my arms. Trust me Nick......just trust me. I'm here. I won't let you fall!" With a small shudder, Nick released Natalie's wrists and enfolded her deep within his embrace. Freed from their confinement, Nat allowed her hands to drift through his silky blonde curls, caressing his face. She murmured words of comfort, kissed his cheeks, his eyes and finally his lips. Nick's raspy breathing increased as the warm blanket of her body heated his own. He hid his face in her hair, kissed her neck, and tightened his hold on her trying to get closer, but it wasn't enough. His need to be one with her made him increase his thrusting tempo into a pounding that drove them closer to the edge of release. Natalie wrapped her legs about his middle and pulled Nick higher to further increase his angle of penetration. Suddenly Nick ceased his pile driving thrusts and pushed himself as deeply as he could go inside of her. He whispered her name as his penis touched the center of her cervix. He grabbed Natalie's hips and began to grind against her, rocking her pelvis against his own. Natalie felt her feminine core coil ever tighter, the heat within her rose. Nick continued to grind his penis against her cervix. And then for a brief second Natalie felt languid, the tension easing. Then as Nick made a single thrust within her, Natalie felt the world begin to fall away as the wave of her orgasm fell upon her. Nick felt her contracting around his penis. He threw his head back in ecstasy feeling the erotic massage of her muscle around him. He began nuzzling her neck again. He took in the scent of the nectar running beneath her skin. Her liquid essence that was calling to him.......He need to be filled with her.....all that was her.........her fire and passion......her devotion........her faith............he wanted all of that and more. He needed it to drive away the horror of the past days. He felt desecrated, raped. Trembling Nick began suckling Nat's neck, caressing it with his tongue. He reared his head back and silently plunged his fangs into Natalie's pliant flesh. As her blood flowed down his throat, he took her essence within him. The light of her soul seared into the darkness of his completing the circle, one half finding the other. He closed his eyes and watched images flash through his mind. And he saw........he saw himself through *her* eyes. And what he saw and felt in her blood humbled him. She gasped at the unexpected onslaught. She felt a brief moment of pain as Nick's fangs penetrated her neck. Natalie's vision began to blur and fade to grey. Visions of the vampire and visions of Nick appeared in her mind. Sensations of swirling darkness, violence, helplessness, horror, and death pounded into her being. It grew large and menacing, threatening to consume her........ "Nick! Nick!" she called. Desperately, Natalie reached out along this new invisible link trying to find him......calling him back........pulling him away from the darkness that threatened to consume him. Nick felt her journey towards himself. He was flailing on dark shores, gasping for renewed life. Gradually the warmth of her lapped around edges of his despairing soul. He began to tingle and feel renewed as her strength surrounded him. The tide became a raging current pulling him back into life-giving waters. He heard her calling him........ and he answered.....Nick shuddered as he felt his own orgasm explode, releasing his seed within her. His body writhed in pleasure as he felt the power of Nat's blood baptize and renew his tattered faith. Nick withdrew his fangs from Natalie's neck. He dropped his head to her shoulder as wracking sobs overtook him. She cradled him, like a child in her arms, stroking his hair. She had never seen him cry before. It took her by surprise. She had seen him enraged, dismayed, forlorn, all sorts of emotions; but he had never allowed his emotions to break free of his tight restraint. For long moments she held him while he released his emotional turmoil, until, finally, he began to pull away. "Oh God, Nat, how could I have done that to you? I'm......" choked Nick, "Nat ..I'm so sorry....I could've.......I could've......" he sobbed. "I should go......I'll pack up and leave....Oh God! What have I done? "No, Nick. Don't go. Stay here with me," replied Nat. "I'm here for you Nick. I've always been here for you..........I'll give you everything I can......you only have to ask." said Nat as she pulled his head back down to her chest. The silent tears rolled down Nick's cheek. He felt Natalie caressing his hair and heard her soft voice crooning to him: You're the bravest if hearts, You're the strongest of souls You're my light in the dark You're the place I call home You can say it's all right But I know you're breakin, up inside I see it in your eyes...... Even you face the night, Afraid and alone That's why I'll be there When the storm rises up, when the shadows descend Every beat of my heart Every day without end Every second I live That's a promise I make Baby that's what I'll give If that's what it takes You can sleep in my arms You don't have to explain When your hearts cryin out Baby whisper my name Cause I've reached out for you When the thunder is crashin up above You've given me your love When you smile like the sun It shines through the rain That's why I'll be there When the storm rises up, when the shadows descend Ev'ry beat of my heart, ev'ry day without end I will stand like a rock, I will bend till I break Till there's no more to give, if that's what it takes I will risk everything, I will fight I will bleed I will lay down my life, if that's what you need Every second I live That's the promise I make Baby that's what I'd give If that's what it takes Through the wind and the rain, through the smoke and the fire When the fear rises up, when the wave's ever higher I will lay down my heart, my body, my soul I will hold on all night and never let go Ev'ry second I live, that's the promise I make Baby, that's what I'll give if that's what it takes............... "Nick you didn't hurt me and that's what matters. It's okay. Stay. ." said Natalie. "I can't.... I might.......lose control again," stammered Nick. "And what will you do if that happens Nick........Stop trying to be the fearless and honourable crusader. Just come here and sleep beside me. You can't run forever. Stay with me. Don't be alone right now," said Natalie. " I can't hide from this Nat. I don't know where to start this time. This set back......." "Nick, you can only start over again and take it one day at a time....." replied Nat in comforting voice. "These emotions won't magically disappear. They'll recede for a while and then at an unexpected moment, it will tear you apart again. And you start...." Nat paused for a moment as she brought his face up to look at her,"you start right here, love. Right here where you are now. I've got you Nick. I'm not going to lose you. I won't let you fall." Nick looked into her eyes and felt humbled by the love he saw shining in them. She had pulled him back from the edge of the maelstrom many times without getting lost in it's center. But this time she was the anchor that bound him to sanity, lashed him to firm ground as the storm had swept over them both. She had held him safe and had not been devoured by the darkness plaguing his soul. "Nat, I love you," said Nick in a humble tone. He sighed and thanked the benevolent spirits that put this woman in his path. And, after silently praying that he wouldn't drag her over the cliff with him he conceded to that love. "All right Nat. All right. I'll stay." Thanks for reading! Any comments, suggestions, or not nice stuff, should be directed to me: Texasbrat barneybluebird@msn.com